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The Marriage Effect: Money or Parenting?



Marques Simmons and Aaliyah Barclift smile after their wedding ceremony at the Manhattan Marriage Bureau inside the new Office of the City Clerk in New York January 12, 2009.
There is a growing marriage gap along class lines in America. This may be bad news for social mobility, since children raised by married parents typically do better in life on almost every available economic and social measure.
But it is important to try and understand why the children of married parents do better. Is it simply because they have, on average, higher family incomes? (Two earners are better than one, and one household is cheaper to run than two.) Or are two committed spouses better able to provide consistent parenting? Is it marriage itself that matters, or is marriage the visible expression of other factors, that are the true cause of different outcomes? And if so, which ones?
The Marriage Gap
In 1950, almost 90 percent of children age 0 to 14 lived with married parents -- now thatproportion has fallen to less than two-thirds of children.   The gap in marriage is growing,especially in terms of childbearing. While marriage is struggling against cultural, social and economic headwinds in poorer communities, it is flourishing among affluent, well-educated Americans who are both more likely to marry and more likely to stay married:

This marriage gap results from a shifting kaleidoscope of social, cultural and economic factors. For a definitive overview of trends, see the forthcoming book Generation Unbound: Drifting into Sex and Parenthood without Marriage  by our colleague Isabel Sawhill.
Married Parents = More Success for Children
Children raised by married parents do better at school, develop stronger cognitive and non-cognitive skillsare more likely to go to collegeearn more, and are more likely to go on toform stable marriages themselves.
Using our own benchmarks of success at different life stages, developed as part of theBrookings Social Genome Model (now a partnership with the Urban Institute and Child Trends), we find similar patterns.
Our adolescent success measure, for example, is to graduate high school with a GPA of at least 2.5 and without either becoming a parent or getting a CRIMINAL RECORD. Two out of three adolescents with mothers married throughout their childhood clear this hurdle, compared to 42% of those with mothers married for some but not all of their childhood and just 28% of those raised by never-married mothers.
But is it the marriage itself that matters? Parents who get and stay married tend to be different in many other important respects from single parents – including having more time, education, and income –  and it may be these differences that lie behind the gaps in their children’s success, rather than the fact of marriage itself.
The principal benefits of growing up with married parents appear to come from two sources:
(1) More MONEYthe income effect
(2) More engaged parenting: the parenting effect
Marriage: The Income Effect
Married-parent families tend to have higher incomes than single-parent families. Part of this is simple addition: two people tend to earn more than one. But people who get and stay married also differ on key factors that influence income. These days, for example, marriage is more common among those with a bachelor’s degree or more, who tend to earn more than those with fewer years of schooling.
Comparisons between the outcomes of children of married and unmarried parents are then, at least to some extent, comparisons between the outcomes of children from well-off families and children from poorer families. The apparent “marriage effect” may actually be an income effect, reflecting the benefits of having more MONEY for children’s development, such as better nutrition, better schools, and safer neighborhoods.
Using the Social Genome Model, we estimate the different outcomes of adult income for children raised by continuously married parents and those raised by parents married for some or none of their childhood years. The specific outcome is their position on the income rank, expressed as a percentile, at or close to the age of 40. We find that children who grow up with continuously married mothers rank on average 14 percentiles higher on the income distribution as adults than those who do not. (The percentile ranks are 57 and 43, respectively).
But is this an ‘income effect’ rather than a ‘marriage effect’? To get an idea of the importance of income, we next control our results for family income throughout childhood. The gap shrinks, from 14 percentiles to 9 percentiles.
Once we also account for differences in a raft of other factors - parenting behavior, maternal education, race, and maternal age - the gap shrinks further to around a 4.5 percentile difference.
It looks then as though a non-trivial proportion – around a third – of the gap in outcomes can be explained by the higher incomes of married parents. But it is also clear that the benefits of having married parents are about more than MONEY. Maybe parenting is part of the answer?
Marriage: The Parenting Effect
One of the main family inputs to a child’s success is the emotional support and cognitive stimulation that they receive from their parents, as we’ve argued in The Parenting Gap.
It is plausible that parents who commit to each other through marriage may also have a stronger joint commitment to raising their children. Indeed, this is one of the reasons people may choose to marry in the first place. Particularly among the well-educated, marriages are increasingly acting as ‘commitment devices’ facilitating what we have elsewhere labeledHigh Investment Parenting, with parents sharing the responsibilities of teaching and caring for their children.
Teasing out the relationship between marriage and parenting behavior is tricky, however. It is likely that many skills and attributes support both marriage and good parenting: commitment, sensitivity, patience, and so on.  People who marry and stay married are also likely to be highly-committed and highly-skilled parents; in which case, we may be seeing a ‘parenting effect’ rather than a ‘marriage effect’.
In order to get a sense of the parenting effect, we conduct the same EXERCISE as the one for family income, but controlling first simply for a measure of parenting. The parenting measure used is the Home Observation for Measurement of the Environment scale, which includes both interviewer observation and mother self-report on parenting behavior like frequency of reading to the child and showing physical affection. (For more details, see our paper, The Parenting Gap).
We find that parenting behavior also appears to help explain the different outcomes: after controlling for parenting, the gap between children of continuously married mothers and others shrinks from 14 percentiles to 7.5 percentiles.
In other words, children of continuously married parents do not outperform other children just because their parents show better parenting behavior, but it does play a large role in the marriage gap.
Promote Parenting, Not Marriage
The benefits of marriage in terms of children’s outcomes and life chances seem clear. The difficulty is teasing out the key factors. Our analysis suggests that both the higher incomes and the more engaged parenting of married parents count for a good deal. If anything, parenting may matter a little more.
What does this mean for public policy? Marriage itself seems to be largely beyond the reach of public policy, with marriage promotion schemes showing little promise, as Ron Haskins outlined in an essay in National Affairs.
If the benefits of marriage for children can be explained by other observable characteristics of the family, and especially MONEY or parenting behavior, then policy may be more successful if focused on those pathways. It would be convenient to find the magic bullet – the one family input that really matters – but of course the truth is messier. Children’s life chances will be influenced by a complicated, shifting mesh of family characteristics (and many other factors outside the family).
Marriage is a powerful means by which incomes can be raised and parenting can be improved. But marriage itself seems immune to the ministrations of policymakers. In which case, policies to increase the incomes of unmarried parents, especially single parents, and to help parents to improve their parenting skills, should be where policy energy is now expended.
Correction: This blog post was amended on September 8th. The sentence "The two-parent family is no longer the typical US family" was changed to more accurately read "In 1950, almost 90 percent of children aged 0 to 14 lived with married parents -- now that proportion has fallen to less than two-thirds of children." 


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Thank you for all that you do. Thank you for being you. We appreciate your existence and the often times silent but impactful role you have played in our lives. As you read the beautiful, beautiful tributes below, know that these can well be the very things that your children (if you have any) and the people you have touched have to say about you; just that they don’t actively articulate these thoughts all the time. For the rest of you, this tribute is get us to actively celebrate our love for our fathers (and mothers) by way of words and actions. Whatever gratitude and love we have for them does not get received if we don’t express them in the first place. Show your dad (and your mom) some love today, tomorrow, and every day. Give him a card. Take him out for dinner. Give him a hug. Share your joy with him. Celebrate the kinship you have together. I present to you, “Why I Love My Father”, by the readers of PE: From Cheryl (New Brunswick, Canada): “What I love about my father, and have only come to appreciate in recent years, is how he simply accepts ‘what is’ in life. He seems to naturally embody “yoga”, which I’ve practiced and taught for many years! No matter what his experiences bring him (e.g. loss, joy, pain), he never comments or complains. Instead, he smiles and asks about your day. Happy Father’s Day, dad – I love you. From Susan: My father carried a laminated quote in his wallet for years. Whenever I got stressed, he would take it out and tell me to read it. About a year before he died, he gave me the card to keep. He said he didn’t need it any more. It said, “Don’t sweat the small stuff. And it’s all small stuff. If you can’t fight, and you can’t flee, flow.” From Giang: I really do not know what to say about my father. Just mean that I love him. He loves us naturally and keeps worrying about us even when we got married and had children. Though he is not rich, he tries to give us some little money as when I was a small girl. I am always his little daughter although I am 32 years old now. Father and Baby From Esin (Istanbul, Turkey): [My father] did all he can do to maintain the best education for me and my elder brother. He worked 7 days a week from 5 am to 8ppm, all day standing up and never lost his joy of life and the humor. Never saw him sick or complaining dramatically. He says “Get to know everything even if you do not apply or use” and “Take care of yourself well so no one suffers becouse of you.” He suffered a lot becouse of my mom’s illnesses. I still have his voice “yabadaba duuuu” coming to play with me when I was 3-4 years old, and he taught me how to read when I was at age of 5. If I have any success in my life this is because I am able to understand thoroughly and well what I read and I owe this speciality first to him. I appreciate him so much, for being in my life. From Charles (Sydney, Australia): Fathers Day is celebrated in September here in Australia. Sadly, my father died in 1975 when I was in my last year of school. When I think about him now, he was a quiet man who enjoyed listening to classical music and opera, enjoyed woodworking and made a desk for me which my daughter is now using. What I loved about him was that he supported my interests and activities (electronics!) as he as was an engineer. I wished I had developed a stronger communication and bond with him in my teenage years – but that is easy to say now that my adolescent years are past. What I remember the most was that he was always there supporting our family and providing a pillar of strength. From Sanjay Kumar Agarwal: In my early childhood, I was frequently surprised when I saw my father struggling for small expenses, which I often used to demand from him. Being a child I was unable to understand his nature as to why he sometimes used to refuse for making some expenses, however small it may be. I could understand the secret when I myself became a father and struggled to manage between ever increasing list of expenses and expectations and my resources to meet the same. When our demands increased, my father started working part time at home. He knew typing and he joined one advocate during evening hours. At late evenings, he used to visit the advocate and do some typing work at this chamber. He used to bring some work even at home and used to work till late night. I often got surprised at his taking pains for some extra money, which at times appeared to be very small amount. But one thing always surprised me. Whenever I asked to buy a book or magazine, he never refused. He used to provide any assistance as far as our career was concerned. He encouraged my brother to join the institute of Chartered Accountants and managed his fees etc. He provided much needed support for me to prepare for competitive examinations. He sent me to Allahabad for taking good coaching classes. He sent me to New Delhi for studies. He always managed money for our studies. When I got appointment as an Inspector of Central Excise in the Ministry of Finance, Government of India and my first salary was disbursed to me, I was happy as it was about ten times than my pocket money and I used to live in another city all alone having all the money to spend on myself. When I returned home, one fine morning I heard my father talking with one neighbor. He was telling him very proudly that I have started my career at a salary which is higher than his salary at the end of his career and this was a proud moment for him. A dream coming true that his sons should become better than himself as far as success in career and earnings is concerned. I was unable to move on my feet. I was ageing about 23 years and rapidly past 23 years flashed into my mind in a moment. I could now understand the meaning of my father’s aspirations. I could understand that whatever decisions my father was taking in past or whatever financial hardships he was facing was determined by his goal of making his children more successful in life than himself. At this place, I could understand the power of goal setting. I could see very clearly the ultimate goal in his mind towards which he thrived for whole of his life and he succeeded. What a father he is! I heartily salute his feelings with thanks & humbleness. If today, I and my brother both are successful in life, this is due to the foresighted goal setting of my father. He never spoke to us on this topic. 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We were disciplined, yet, he would nudge us to improve, but it never felt motivated by anger… only love. He was quick to forgive. We were taken care of. We did fun stuff and had nice things, but not pampered or spoit because he knew where to draw the line. He was unselfish. He loved his family – his father, mother, educated his brothers and sisters, and got them married too, all from his savings, despite looking after his immediate family which was us. He worked hard at his job not because of the money, but because he believed in what he did. He knew when to quit for the day. He loved eating meals together. He lived within his means. He knew the difference between want and need. He cared about people more than money. He looked for opportunities to serve… especially those who couldn’t help themselves, and was also generous. He was always honest, both to us and to others. I never remember him telling a lie. 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Gave me whole freedom in my life. I love him… I am lucky to have him as my father , each and every birth I need him as my father. From Celes, Singapore My father has done more for me than he has ever let on. He has always quietly supported me in my life, in every step of the way. He has always been working hard to support me and the family since I was young, never complaining at any point at all. He has cultivated important values of hard work, humility, and respect (for others) in me. I’m truly, truly, blessed to have a father like him and I love him with all my heart. I would like to be his daughter again in my next life, as well as in all my other lifetimes after that. Happy Father’s Day dad!! ♥ Father and Daughter From Shrikant (Maharashtra, India): My father taught me the realities of life. At times only he was earning he has to work hard as a primary teacher. He used to leave the village at 6.00 AM in the morning and return by 10.00 PM in the night. 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“Why I Love My Father”: A Father’s Day Tribute. Happy Father’s Day To All Father Figures! :) Note from Celes : This is a 2012 tribute post from PE to all fathers around the world, and I’m republishing it to wish all fathers a Happy Father’s Day. To all fathers, may you have the most wonderful time with your family!  Thank you everyone for your  wonderful responses  to the  Father’s Day Tribute .   It was truly very heartwarming for me to read all your beautiful entries surrounding your father and your relationship with him. Today is Father’s Day (for those of you in Asia, that would be yesterday) and I’d like to dedicate this post to  all the wonderful fathers, father figures, and male mentors out there  who have touched the lives of people out there: be it your own kids, others’ kids, your family, people you’ve mentored, people you’ve coached, and the world at large. Thank you for all that you do.  Thank you for being you.  We appreciate your existence and the often tim

அவர் எனது கண்மணி

இது போலதான் நம் தேவன் நம்மை அவர் கண்ணுக்குள் வைத்திருக்கிறார் .நாம் அவர் கண்களுக்குள் இருக்கிறோம் நம்மை தொடுவதற்கு அவர் ஒருவரை தவிர வேறு ஒருவருக்கும் அதிகாரம் இல்லை.        இதை விட ஒரு பாதுகாப்பான ஒரு இடம் இந்த பூமியில் எங்கும் இல்லை.அவர் கண்களுக்குள் இருக்கும் நான் அவர் கண்களை உறுத்தாமல் இருக்க வேண்டும்.

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